What If You Are a Virgin on a New York Dating App?
We live in a hook-up culture nowadays. That means:
1) a lot of people are sexually liberated and have hooked up with many lovers already;
2) those who are not sexually experienced may lack confidence in this day and age.
•If you’re a virgin on a New York dating app, don’t assume that everyone in New York operates like Samantha Jones.
Samantha Jones doesn’t exist. She only exists in a fiction. Don’t believe that a fictional character is realistic.
The reason I rarely read fictions is because I don’t think most novels actually portray people correctly because the majority of those stories are too far away from reality.
Don’t get me wrong. I think some fictions are very good because they provide us with vivid examples of how certain things are done. But high-quality fictions are rare.
Therefore, it’s time to question many New Yorkers’ role model – Samantha Jones.
In fact, most women’s sexuality is very different from Samantha Jones’ sexuality. Even Kim Cattrall says she doesn’t know anyone’s sexuality is like Samantha Jones’.
Hence, as a virgin on a New York dating app, there is no pressure on you – you should feel free to date whoever you like. Lack of sexual experience doesn’t make you worse than anyone else. Remember: Even Samantha Jones was a virgin when she was younger!
Having said that, I highly encourage you to lose your virginity as soon as you can. Perhaps when you are 18 or 19 years old, you should lose your virginity whenever there is an opportunity to do that. Or maybe you can lose your virginity in your early 20s. That’s perfectly fine.
When Liam McRae was dating an Asian girl who was a virgin, she was really looking forward to her sexual encounter with Liam McRae. And it turned out to be a very romantic, positive experience for her.
When Anastasia was dating Christian Grey, she was also a virgin. And there is nothing wrong with that. Her virginity made the story more exciting.
Thus, if you are a virgin and you would like to join a New York dating app to lose your virginity, it’s time to do it now. After that, you will feel liberated because a task that needs to be done is done!
Many people in traditional cultures put virginity on a pedestal, and I personally think that’s a mistake, because having s*x for the first time is rarely a nice experience. Most people’s first sexual encounter is embarrassing and difficult. And that’s very normal.
Therefore, you can take some action now if you’d like to join a New York dating app and meet someone who can sleep with you soon, so that there is nothing to worry about later on. You will be free to enjoy your sexuality after losing your virginity.
• If you are a sexually inexperienced guy, don’t put pussy on a pedestal.
In June 2019, a 22-year-old young man wrote us a letter, asking what he should do as a sexually inexperienced guy – he only had one girlfriend who slept with him for three times over two years, so he doesn’t have much experience sexually. In May 2019, he was dating an 18-year-old girl whom he slept with once. Because his performance in bed wasn’t very good, she didn’t answer his phone call again.
I appreciate his honesty and his trust in us. I also would like to thank him for allowing us to share his story on this blog. Actually, that problem is more common than you know. His anxiety comes from his beliefs that are wrong:
1) S*x is important.
2) Young women judge men based on men’s sexual performance.
3) Pussy should be put on a pedestal.
Now I’m going to debunk every false belief that he has.
First of all, s*x is one of the least important things in this world. When anyone can do it, the value of s*x is quite low. Also, if people can do it while getting drunk, they don’t value s*x. Moreover, these days people can have casual s*x with random people on New York dating apps; consequently, that means s*x isn’t valued at all.
Apart from that, I’d like to point out that the ability to sleep with women should be a natural skill for any man, including this 22-year-old guy. We all remember that when we were about 18 years old, we could be aroused simply by looking at someone hot. That was our natural response. We can’t force that.
Later on, because we have been conditioned to repress our feelings , our sexual response has been changed accordingly based on what our culture wants us to believe.
As a matter of fact, the ability to sleep with someone should be as natural as the ability for the sun to provide sunshine. It’s 100% natural. We are all biologically programmed to do that.
Please don’t think you have to read 100 books about sexuality and then you will be able to sleep with someone. You already can do it. You must believe this truth.
In the second place, most young women don’t judge men for men’s sexual performance in the bedroom. This is especially true for 18-year-old ladies. This 22-year-old gentleman met that 18-year-old girl on a New York dating app, and then they slept together once and he ejaculated too early. He never hears from her again.
This guy chose to believe that this girl stopped talking to him because of his bad performance in bed. But that’s only his assumption. There can be many other reasons why she stopped talking to him.
Please note that most 18-year-old girls are clueless in this area, so she doesn’t really have any expectations of men that she goes to bed with.
Last but not least, this 22-year-old guy puts pussy on a pedestal – that’s a huge mistake. That’s the root cause of his sexual anxiety.All anxieties come from beliefs that are wrong.
What I told him to do is to change his belief system. Instead of wondering how to please women and hoping women will say yes to him, he should begin to look at what women can do for him.
He would be well-advised to look at his expectations of women from now on. This will change the dynamics completely.
Once he has expectations of women, he won’t focus on his i nsecurities anymore. That will transform his love life forever.
He should ask, “What can she do for me? Does she meet my standards? Can she look after my sexual needs?” This will make his dating life much better on the New York dating app in the future.
•How to prepare for a date after joining a New York dating app:
In New York City, there are many things to do if you are planning on going out for a date with someone that you’ve met online.
For example, you can go to the Fifth Avenue if you are keen to go shopping with your date. Or you may want to go to Soho House if you are a VIP.
But before going out for a date with someone you’ve met on a New York dating app, I think you may want to prepare well for the date.
Good preparation is the key to confidence because preparation gives you competence which leads to core confidence.
In the first place, you should choose an outfit that you like. It doesn’t need to be a new outfit. In fact, I think it will be better if it’s not a new outfit because if you are wearing something new for the first time, you may not feel comfortable in it.