If you are a single mom or a single dad, this article is dedicated to you. Today I’d like to talk about how to find true love after a divorce so that you will be able to reignite the passion in you and connect with someone suitable.
I know many single parents who have become hugely successful after the divorce. Further analysis reveals that these individuals have found a formula for thriving not just in spite of whatever happens, but because of it.
I know this sounds a bit strange – an individual becomes more successful after the divorce?! You may wonder how that can happen.
Well, that happens all the time. What’s in the way becomes the way. What impedes us can empower us, if you know how to use everything, anything to your advantage.
Victoria M. is the founder of a single parents’ dating app. She was a single mother for many years and then she found her true love online. After that, she decided to start a single parents’ dating app so that single moms and single dads can meet each other on the Internet and build meaningful relationships.
“My resourcefulness and creativity got started after the divorce,” says Victoria M., founder of the single parents’ dating app, “I learned how to turn those obstacles upside down after reading Ryan Holiday’s book The Obstacle Is the Way a few years ago.”
Indeed, great people, like great companies, always find a way to transform weakness into strength. As a matter of fact, they use it to move forward .
When Victoria’s first marriage was over, she was so upset that she had to hire a therapist. That therapist flipped her obstacles upside down by introducing a business conference to her because the therapist knows that Victoria was eager to start her own business.
Then Victoria went to the business conference and learned a lot. Later on, she started a single parents’ dating app which has become very successful on the market. One year later, Victoria sold her business to Brilic. That’s why Brilic has got the database from her app as well. No wonder diversity is celebrated on Brilic dating app. Indeed, all kinds of relationships can be found via Brilic these days because we believe that everyone has the right to find true love that they deserve.
“What I’ve learned through that experience is most of my obstacles are internal, not external,” says Victoria M., “Instead of seeing my first marriage as a failure, I changed the way I look at it – I think it was actually quite successful because I had a son with my ex-husband. Then I learned how to leverage the knowledge and skills that I’ve accumulated over the years, so I started my own business, meaning my problems became opportunities.”
Victoria M. is a perfect example of how to create new openings wherever a door is shut. As I see it, obstacles are not only to be expected but embraced – difficulties in life are opportunities to try new things and to triumph in life.
Successful individuals understand the importance of non-stop personal development, so they cherish every opportunity to learn something.
Bill Clinton famously said, “What really m atters isn’t what these obstacles are but how we see them, how we react to them and whether we keep our composure.” He points out that this reaction actually determines how successful we will become in overcoming difficulties or thriving because of difficulties in life.
When Bill Clinton was attacked by his enemies, he remained calm, confident and charismatic. Therefore, he was thriving because of obstacles – his supporters became much more supportive after the scandal in 1998. And Bill Clinton is considered one of the most popular presidents in US history.
A switched-on person can see opportunity in every difficulty and transform that problem into an education, a skill set or even a fortune. And that’s exactly what Victoria M. did – she became the founder of a single parents’ dating app.
“Everything that happens is a chance to move forward,” says Victoria M., founder of the single parents’ dating app, “Apart from looking after my son, every waking minute of mine was spent reading at that time – philosophy, economics, business management, personal development and entrepreneurship. I made the most of the time I had on my hands, although life was busy when I started my own business.”
Victoria M. acknowledges that she made a mistake when she married her ex-husband, but a mistake became training later on. She learned a wealth of knowledge regarding dating, relationships and marriages; therefore, she understands the online dating industry very well, thereby starting a single parents’ dating app.
Just because your mind tells you that something is terrible or hard or otherwise negative doesn’t mean you have to agree. You decide what story to tell yourself. Or whether you will tell one at all.
If your mind tells you that love is hard, you don’t have to agree with your mind. If your mind tells you that you won’t find love again, you can say “I disagree with you.”
When life becomes overwhelming because your kids are naughty and the household chores are plenty, you can say, “No, thank you. I can’t afford to panic.” As a single parent, you would be well-advised to focus your energy exclusively on solving problems instead of reacting to problems. Then you will have the bandwidth to look for love again.
In the book The Gift of Fear, author Gavin de Becker writes, “When you worry, ask yourself, ‘What am I choosing to not see right now?’ What important things are you missing because you chose worry over introspection, alertness or wisdom?”
That is a very good point. Real strength lies in the control of and the domestication of your emotions, not in pretending they don’t exist. So, feel the fear, and do it anyway! You can join the dating scene again now. Don’t wait until you are ready; start before you are ready. If you wait until you’re ready, you might wait forever because perfection is based on insecurity.
You may write down this motto for your desk: I am in control, not my emotions. I see what’s really going on here. I am not going to get upset when difficult situations arise.
Yes, you can defeat negative emotions with your logic which is best characterized by questions and statements.
When your children upset you, you ask yourself, “Do I need to freak out about this?”
Then you answer, “No, because I have practiced for this situation and I am able to control myself.”
After learning how to manage your emotions, you will be able to enjoy a single parents’ dating app and explore the beauty of dating again.
Laura Ingalls Wilder says, “There is good in everything, if only we look for it.” I understand that joining the dating department again in your late 30s and even 40s isn’t easy.
Downloading a single parents’ dating app is simple, but it doesn’t mean this journey is easy. You just need to love the journey and don’t focus on the reward.
“Joining a single parents’ dating app – you’ll now be twice as good at dating since you will do it again.”